The Ramblings of Elyse

It is now time for my favourite thing ever to write! Yay! Favourites!



It is time for Inadvertently Ask Elyse, where I take all the people who have stumbled upon my blog with their questions and answer them like they were actually asking me.

I can only hope that I have taught people the value of the side hug and the most appropriate places to side hug (with photos!) 

And since the last Inadvertently Ask Elyse was here and that was like a year ago, I have a lot to catch up on.
I do know that the most frequent search request I get is about kid goats and I have that covered for all you goat lovers out there. Read that and look at the cute pictures of goats.
With a closer inspection, not only is the kid goat number one my searches, it also appears another 11 times within the list of searches.

Where is all this goat loving coming from?
I think I've doomed my internet writing career to goats and hugs.

You know, I don't have a problem with this.

Should we move onwards because I do have a lot of stuff to write about hugs.

One Sided Hugs
The first thing we need to clarify with the one sided hug is do you mean that it is emotionally only one sided. The longing hug you give when you are madly in love with the person you are hugging but they are just hugging you in a platonic manner, or the "I'm hugging you, why aren't you hugging me?" 
Like this:

The wolf is not enjoying the bear hug.

The alternative is that it is just a two person side hug, which means that only one side is involved.

You can also have a situation that combines the two:

I actually stole this photo. Which is the only reason I included it.

Side Hug From A Guy

I can only assume if you are getting a side hug from a guy are concerned about it, you have seen this and you are just doing your Christian duty, so you keep up the good work until there is a ring on that finger.

The Christian Side Hug is never not funny.

Side Hugs are For Friends
Woah, step back there.
Side Hugs are for EVERYONE!

Ramblings of Elyse
That's me!
In fact, this search might have been mean...
Apparently I suck at answering my own questions. Oh... well... Moving along!

When writing songs don't be literal
This is a hard one, since I do listen to a lot of musicals and when you are writing an exposition song, which is a very important part of writing songs to a musical, you need to go the literal place. If all your exposition is in metaphor then your plot becomes like the wind and hard to see, you can feel it in places but it is just all over the places.
See what I did there?
I doubt it because that wasn't a metaphor, it was a simile.
There is a place for metaphors, simile, euphemisms and other ways to talk around things. Yeah, we get you are trying to woo the man or woman of your choice through song, but you can just put it straight out there and it works or you can go straight up confusing metaphor.  

Just try and remember what words actually mean.


"a short poem or other set of words set to music or meant to be sung"
What is a ballad?

"leave our boats behind"
I know this as a song that is the Galilee Song, however, that is not as fun.

This is what I would yell across that sea as my pirate saying, and then if they didn't leave their boats behind, I'd shoot cannons and force them do so and then those boats would be mine. Muwhahahahaha!

Are literal versions of songs real?
They are real in the terms at they exist as a piece of music, but they are not performed by the people who wrote the original song, nor are they the same lyrics. Naturally, this is what makes it funny.
But why would that stop it from being real?

Best literal version of song
Total Eclipse of the Heart, without a doubt. I would link but it is no longer available in my country and I just died on the inside.

Buffy lore crosses
The cross in Buffy is used as a repellent against vampires, it doesn't actually kill them it merely burns them and while the vampire doesn't like it, they can stand it in situations such as at the end of the Buffy episode Angel where Angel and Buffy kiss and Buffy is wearing a cross necklace, the one she got from Angel in Welcome the Hellmouth, and when she leaves there is a close up of Angel's chest which features the burnmark of the cross.
In most cases it works to repeal, but in the case of vampire nutbags such as Kralik from Helpless who kind of digs the pain, but you know nutbag.

The cross is also used in rituals such as the vampire uninvited spell that requires hanging of the cross. I believe in traditional vampire law the cross is representative of the faith of the person wielding it and that is where the power comes from, so it is debatable whether a Star of David would have the same effect for someone that is Jewish, such as Willow in the world of Buffy. It is worth mentioning that since when Willow is putting up the cross she makes a comment about how her Jewish dad is not likely to be happy. 
As the series progresses vampires become less and less prominent as villains and as a result there is less and less cross play in Buffy.

Can a hug be assault
Yes, it can, but I'm pretty sure at that point we wouldn't call it a hug.
The best example of this would be the bear hug, which is an actual attack move, as well as a particularly strong hug.
There is a fine line in some cases and it comes down to intent.
Also, good life advice: Don't hug real bears. Even the wolves don't like it.

Don't Stop Believing Australia Rob Mills
No, Australia, please stop believing in Rob Mills. Go away Millsy! GO AWAY!!


Elyse Fillion
That is who I would be if I married Nathan Fillion, and last time I checked that wasn't in the cards. I wouldn't say no, but you know, just gotta wait for that one.
Sorry Taylor.


Elyse needs
Oh, I need so many things... So, so many things.
I think I might start with Nathan Fillion to call me.


I just want to know why so many people are googling hugging?
Really?
Though, I like to consider myself an internet hugging authority.

For regulars or anyone that has ever talked to me, I'm a massive Buffy fan.

I'm the go to Buffy knowledge person, I can tell you many things, many, many things. I'm a pretty big Angel fan as well.

My opinion changes frequently on which one I prefer, and it depends of timing. The biggest advantage of Angel is that features Cordy and doesn't feature Spike. Please refer to my previous posts about my feelings on Spike (or recapped "What the fuck? Seriously?").

So, I laugh at anyone that dear question my Buffy cred, but then we get to Firefly.

Apparently Firefly is the go to thing. I've gotten into many arguments about Firefly and my dislike of it. Yeah, that's right, I do not like Firefly.
Try and convince me that it's the greatest thing ever and I say you're fucked and hate it a little bit more.

This never became more apparent that one day when I was at the Friday night LAN night I go to every now and then, and there was a new dude who went to uni with one of the regulars. But new dude, new dude was a Fanboy and as a result of that conversation next time I saw New Dude he is all like "so there's the Firefly hater".
New Dude, fuck you, and take my pamphelet of my new campaign for world peace and stop being a douche.

Not only did New Dude not respect my dislike of Firefly but this somehow took away from my nerd cred and was all like "You'd be destroyed if you met (someone whose name I don't remember)".
Once again, fuck you.

Yes, I don't like Firefly and it went for 14 episodes and was canceled with 4 of those episodes not going to air, so, I'm not the only person that didn't like it.

But my main issue with Firefly is the fucking fanboys like New Dude mentioned above. Seriously? That is what is taking away from my Nerd Cred. I've seen every episode and know enough about it to get by, I own the DVD and have spread the DVD love around and that's not counting everything else?
Yeah, well, whatever.

The Fanboys that insistent it is the greatest piece of Television ever, guess what guys. It's not.
14 episodes. They are not good odds, though, if you manage to truly fuck up in 14 episodes then wow, no words for that.
I've gotten into the conversation many times "how can you call yourself a Joss Whedon fan if you don't like Firefly?"

Well, for starters, I don't.
That guy is a douche. All his fanboys are douches.

I point to Season 6 and 7 of Buffy as this, Season 6 in particular.
Season is considered by the Buffy fans I speak to as a whole bunch of crap. The particular issues- The lack of commitment into Willow going from the power of magic corrupting to a drug metaphor (the change happens in Smashed) which provides a nice little cop out for the evil of Willow, the inconsistency of Spike (evil/Best.Boyfriend.Ever/Buffy's confidante/whatever) resulting in the almost rape in Seeing Red, Giles shodding reason for leaving and then the adding of Amber Benson being added to the credits upon the episode which Tara is murdered. I think the Spike getting a soul also a major issue.

The killing Tara created lots of fan backlash, especially from the gay and lesbian community who loved them some Tara and Willow action, in especially the way she died and then Willow tries to kill the world, which fits into some kind of stereotype of dead/evil lesbians. I'm not sure about that so Enjoy this link about some of that Backlash... It's interesting.

Anyway, these things are not apparently the responsibility of Joss Whedon, oh no, these developments are at the fault of Marti Noxon, who was a writer on the show since season 2 but became the showrunner and executive producer is Season 6.
Yes, all these developments are her fault.
Which, bullshit. Joss would of had to sign off on them and most of the developments are heavily featured if not start in episode of Season 6 that Joss Whedon wrote- Once More with Feeling.

So, I call bullshit.
And Fuck you Joss Whedon, he is not my master.

But back to Firefly.
The problem with Firefly is that it starts off with 9 cast members. So, there are 9 main characters that are all introduced at the same time and as a result some characters are going to be mariginalised.
Shepard Book is my prime example of this, mainly, what the fuck is the deal with Shepard Book?
And don't give me this "They are making a comic about Shepard Book that will be released soon" because that is a cop out. It's been 6 years it ended and they had a movie and what happened?
They killed him in a scene that was completely just to propell Captain Mal into Reaver territory and that's not the fact that in the scene prior to that Captain Mal coming to Book for some kind of advice or whatever, which never fit into what happened in the series.

Plus, I don't think there was a scene in Serenity (the movie, not the episode) with Jayne and Book, who tended to do a lot of stuff together in the series.

The things of the movie and series are annoying.
The movie sucked, but then again, I hate River.
Especially the end that since River is no longer crazy she is just fucking awesome at everything. Fuck you, River.

Don't get me wrong, I like the cast. I think the cast is awesome and makes up for the lack of incoherent plot or at least things that don't make sense for a series that takes place in space.

Basically, I don't like it and many of the things just do not make sense.

I haven't watched it enough to be able to go through and make detailed lists of why I don't like Firefly.

But it's the fanboys who tell me it is the greatest thing ever that piss me off the most and convinced me for a long time to never give it a chance.

And for the love of god, Shut up, River!