The Ramblings of Elyse

Back in 2006, it was an Antioch Weekend. It was a pirate theme, but that is not the point of this story, in my sleep group there was this recruit who was a theology student or something, but at some point on the Saturday night we were discussing interventions.
And it was at that point I was taught that the intervention is all about "I" statements.

I should have learnt that previously due to the episode of Buffy entitled "Revelations", the episode called Intervention isn't until later in the series.

So that is when I learnt about interventions. It wasn't straight away when I started giving them. I believe I started just saying I knew how to give one. I think it's best not to try and interpret the timeline of my obsessions, it will never end well.

We always made a big joke about the whole self obsessed nature of interventions, because it always seemed so hilarious.
I think that attitude all changed in February, when I gave what I guess was an impromptu intervention, which was really more of a "what the fuck are you doing?" and the whole you are fucking up your life had no impact because it is a "What of it", the belief that it is my life and I'll do what I like with it is the response.
Then as soon as a pointed out the negative effects on other people, not just in terms of the emotional "it upsets me" thing, but the hard cold, indisputable facts that is what made them shut up and listen.
I think it has completely messed up my relationship with them, but those are the consequences that happen.

It has got me thinking two, one of why interventions are so self centred, because that is what make people stand up and notice that actions affect everyone and the infamous butterfly effect. Nothing exists in a vacuum and it is the thing I forget most when engaged in my theatre of pain.
The second is, what is my role in all of this?

I'm self centred, yes, I'm only human, faults and all that is one of them.
It keeps coming back to the fact that I seem to be an impact player. I'm not in this for the long haul. I can't be in it for the long haul because it's not how I operate.
I'll come off the bench, shake up the nature of the game and then go back to the bench.
I have plenty of other metaphors to use, but I probably should stop it there.

Some times I have too many thoughts.