The Ramblings of Elyse

Titles and names are the two weakest points of my ability as a writer.

Not that I am a great writer by any means, but I am really incapable of thinking up names and titles. When we used to have to do the creative writing part of English exams and have to write whatever the thing was, I'd try to either use first and second person or just look around the room and go on weird associations in my mind to get to names.

What that has to do with anything?

Well, I hate making up titles of blogs. I am just bad at it.

I'll Never Tell is the current song I'm listening. Yes, it is the Once More with Feeling Soundtrack and yes, it IS awesome. Thanks for asking.

So, I'm sure everyone here is thinking, "Why am I reading this again?" "Wow, Elyse, she is super insightful" or "What the fuck you mother fucker! YOU LIED! YOU SAID YOU'D NEVER WRITE AGAIN! How can we trust you again, you fucking motherfucker fucker!"

It might not have involved that much swearing, but I saw [Title of Show] last week and it features lots of swearing. The listening to the original cast recording hasn't helped with my swearing either. 

That's my excuse and I'm sticking to it.

So yes, yes I did say that I wasn't going to write in here again and for a brief second that was an accurate statement.
I had planned to not write in here ever again.
However, I am not in the  same place as I was last week. I'd go into that more, but you know, that is not a conversation for the blog.
If you'd like to have that conversation. I have never been a particularly hard person to find.
Just saying.


You know, I can't even work out who that is really directed to but I'm sure I'm going to get in trouble for it.

So, I'm back.
I'll come and go, but absolute statements are foolish to make and I try and avoid them as a rule, it just ends badly.

In honour of my glorious return to the blogger realm, I present this clip.
Listen to it. It's good.

Due to a conversation I had last night, I will no longer be writing on here.

You're welcome.

I catch a lot of trains. I do a lot of thinking on them. Strange, strange thoughts.
If you've read my Twitter you might be aware of some of them.

So strange thoughts, trains and the new-ish iPhone have finally combined for some awesome blogging action. And that's my favourite kind of action. Hot.

Now with the train and lack of spell check there is much more chance to see my horrible spelling and that might be a little bit awesome.

I think I need to take awesome off my list of words because i'm overusing and need to move on from the awesome.

My train of thought derailed and I can't even remember vaguly what I was writing about.
It might have just been I'm on a train and am are trend whore with my iPhone.

Mmm trend whore.


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

I realised something as I started to write a blog post last week and as I watched the Glee finale and the episode of Masterchef that came before it.

Masterchef is a horrible, horrible show. Seriously, stop with the crying.
Though, those people are clearly uncomfortable hugging and it's like the producers are making them do the hugging and that makes me laugh.

That wasn't actually the point, but I realised that I judge television, and well most elements of popular culture just ridiculously harshly.
I like to think I don't do that to real people, but I probably do. I should do it more, I've dreamed of being the judgmental friend. I'd make an awesome judgmental friend. Does anyone need one?

As I sat and watched the Glee Finale that aired in Australia tonight, I started to think about the plot points that annoyed me and put them on Twitter.
There were a lot, so I thought I'd move them to a blog post.
I then recalled what watching TV does to me and decided to create a new segment of my blog for when things strike the mood.

The "Elyse Harshly Judges", I will take suggestions of things that are both bad and good, and I will watch and the judge... harshly.
It seemed like fun at the time.

Now, as a warning, it is in the title, HARSHLY judging. If you disagree, put it in the comments, if you agree put it in the comments.
Seriously, people can you start writing comments, I need some external validation here. I will reply to them.
That being said "Dude, that show was AWESOME" is not a disagreement and it might not necessarily be a view I disagree with, it's the belief that just because I am being mean and pointing out flaws means I can't be a fan and a statement upon which I call bullshit.

But to start off this, I have decided to go with the Glee Finale! 
Huzzah! Glee!

And I don't think I need to add this but...



This is the second time I've seen the episode, the first time was a mysterious event several weeks ago that I can't recall anything about. The second time was this evening when it aired on Channel Ten.

I am trying to remember how it starts. Does it start with the flashback to Puck and Quinn?

Yeah, my memory has been off all day. I'm  hoping I don't get delirious sick again.

I'm glad they did the flashback because they really did needed to show that it wasn't Puck taking advantage of a drunken Quinn.
And I'm just going to put it out there, that in the finale, I do love Quinn and Puck together. Especially at the point where they are standing there looking at the baby. I can buy it, I can completely buy Puck standing there and telling Quinn that he loves her more at that point, I buy it more that if at that point Quinn said she would keep the baby, he'd do anything in his power to try and do right by both of them and it's sweet. Plus, calling the baby Beth, with the song.
Puck as a character, is not a good guy, he is the bad guy and the massive douche, but in moments like that it kind of counter acts it.

So, Puck telling Quinn he loves her, that I love, that I am sold on.
Finn telling Rachel he loves her? No.
Shue telling Emma he loves her? No. No. No. No. No. NO no no no no. NO! NO! No no no NO!
16 noes? Really?

Ok, so the Puck and Quinn part is my favourite part of the episode because basically, I love a bad boy with a heart.
I am trying to think of another fictional example, but I've got nothing, so it might just be Puck.
Oh... Pacey started off as kind of a douche, but he made up for it.
I think Cordy is my Buffy equivalent.

Anyway.
So, my Shue and Emma?
So, Puck is MEANT to be a douche. Will is meant to be a good guy, but is kind of a douche.

My main issue with the whole Emma declaration of love is that she made it quite clear they were over at the begining of the episode and in a previous episode, but dude, she is seeing someone else. THAT WASN'T A SECRET!
Actually, I have multiple issues.
One is a general construct of film and television and that is the grabbing people to make them turn around and listen. I just really don't like that. That's just not cool. It is just such a controlling gesture and it is not something that is going to go places.

And the biggest issue I have, they are in the middle of the school hallway! THE SCHOOL HALLWAY! And are teachers!
Now, I'm old, so I now know way more teachers than students or at least more people studying to be teachers than I know high school students.
But pretty sure you can't go making out with people in the hallway in the middle of the school day.
I was actually going to ask someone but amazingly I had none of those people online.
Ok, there are actually very few people that I'd go "hey, man, you know how you are a teacher or gonna be a teacher, how do you think school policy would go with you having a public display of emotion followed by some making out in the middle of the hallway?" or quad, depending if you had hallways. My school didn't have hallways.

This is a follow on issue, there is so frequently yelling happening in the principal's office, that you can apparently hear while standing in the hallway... that is a major lane of movement for students.
What the hell show?

I can't sustain my disbelief about that.
I spent a lot of time in the office while I was at school, yes I was a trouble maker, surely this isn't news to any one and they tried to minimise the whole "look at me sitting in the office" thing as much as possible, so why go for the glass office show? Why?

I think I've read a fair bit about Sue Sylvester and the saving the Glee, I actually don't have a problem with it and basically it comes down to two things for me and that is to quote Kurt from the previous episode "she's one of us, and no one humiliates her except for us"  and Sue's line that "as an educator" in the judges scene.
That for all the big talk and the heartlessness, which frankly is what makes Glee great, that she is an educator and on some level is in it for the kids and those are layers and I love them. Especially since she never told Will that she voted for New Directions or took the praise from her.

Horrible people who come through in the end work so much better for me than the sanctimonious bullshit from the good guys we are meant to barrack for.


As for the Finn and Rachel I love you, I seriously enjoy the fact she never says anything in return. I think I would have liked it better if there was something with Jesse.
I don't like that there were NO scenes with Jesse and Rachel in the finale.
I don't think Jesse is the villain of the piece. I can accept that he loved Rachel, and Rachel hurt him and he lashed out to hurt her back, maybe I bringing my own belief into that, but it works for me.
I don't see Jesse twirly his mustache or anything.

Oh, Idina, Idina, Idina, I love you, but there are so many aspects of your character that are strange.
You can still have a relationship with Rachel!
It's just different. You tried to find her, and then I think Shue fucked it up by telling her to basically stay away.
But dude, come on!
She is reaching out, don't cut her back like that.
It breaks my Idina loving heart right there.

My biggest issue with the Idina character was actually in last week's episode with the egging of Rachel by Vocal Adrenaline, Idina, that shit shouldn't fly with you!
GO TO TOWN ON THEM! Defend your daughter!

The adopting thing, not much of a problem, just the whole Rachel reaching out, do something with that. Just fucking hug her already!

I do talk about hugging an awful lot. I think you people should just hug me more.
People I know, not random strangers, unless you approach with caution.

Now the moment:
SONG CHOICE!

New Directions or the Glee Kids...
They went with a Journey Medley so we could get a nice line about how life has one real begining and one end and everything else is just middle.
Which is the whole journey part and thus Journey Medley.

Here it is, just because I care about you people.




I think Don't Stop Believing isn't one of their strongest choices.
Though, I really wish they'd do more stuff with harmonies and be more choir like and less solos with back up vocals.
In terms of starting from the back of the room thing "Don't Rain on My Parade" was a better candiate for it and a better song and well, starting at the back of the room is just inconsiderate to your audience.

You only do that with a chorus, so that EVERYONE can see what is happening. Two soloists in the crowd?
OF a two story theatre?
Yeah, fuck off. That's just inconsiderate and not working the crowd or the judges.

I don't like the Journey medley. They could have done better.
Just saying, don't like it.

I do enjoy Santana and Puck getting solos though in Don't Stop Believing but that key change is horrible, just atrocious.
It only goes up one step, but oh em gee... It just doesn't work and I can't even work out why, I just do not care much for it. Stop with the key change.

That and they look like they are having fun, which is was a big part of their schtick and seriously, they are having an awesome time.


Now onwards to Jesse St James and his Funky Bunch.



That isn't a choir. This one is completely just Jesse and backup singers.
Now, I'm not sure about Glee and Lip syncing, I'm going with yes because I've watched television before but will happily admit to being wrong but I just doubt it and I don't have an issue with it, it's only if they were performing live where I have that issue but whatever.

The lip syncing was just off, so it made it really obvious.
That and the choregraphy with the throwing around just annoys me, it's like hairography or we just cast Rob Mills to play Fieryo and need to do something to make up for his lack of actual talent so we'll make him run around a stage.

I don't think it should have won a choir competition because it wasn't a choir.
I was surprised they went with the full length of the song, but it was cut with Quinn so it made sense, I thought it was time cut, but apparently not.

I would have preferred shorter song and some kind of scene with Rachel and Jesse because come on! COME ON! You can't just go declaration of love from Finn and then starring kind of longingly at Jesse and then I get no emotional resolution for that. Bah!
Curses to you show! CURSES TO You!

That and Jonathon Groff just can not do that ending and it killed me for it, the American accent really came through and it is just not how it goes.

Too much screaming on the high notes too. Mr Groff, you are no Freddie Mercury.
VA, you are no rest of Queen.
There are ready made harmonies there! USE THEM! Embrace them!

Where did the crowd even get the glow sticks?


The non-competition stuff.


Ultimately, I felt this episode just wanted to make me cry.
For the record it didn't, on that same record, I have no issues admitting to things that make me cry: Montages to Sarah McLachlan (Becoming Part 2, Toy Story 2), the Dawson's Creek Finale, A League of Their Own, Lexi, Cordy's farewell scene in You're Welcome, Toy Story 3.

They tried so hard and threw everything there, but alas, show, you tried too hard and I saw what you were doing.


I really hope that it is Burt Hummel that taught Finn what it meant to be a man, because I think Shue is kind of douche (especially to Emma), where as Burt is just all kinds of awesome... Especially to Kurt and well, to Finn as well.




So that's the Glee kids singing to Shue... While Sue looks on!
That's just straight song, obviously.

I was mainly excited that Other Asian and Shaft got lines!

Overall, it didn't blow me away.
Too much going on and not enough resolved.
The song choices were not the greatest, but I did like that the judges portraying themselves were arseholes. That is a little bit awesome right there.

My favourite thing to happen was the fact they didn't win, basically, in reality, they wouldn't have. I know it's boring TV, but they would have spent weeks, if not months rehearsing their set and getting it perfect and mastering.
However, Television makes it hard because no one wants to see that, but since I'm taking it into consideration.

I don't think I judged harshly enough.
I'll work on it.

Wow, my spelling is atrocious. Or as spell check is advising my spelling is also atrocious- attractions and ferocious.
You know it spell check, you know it.

One day I would write something and have it untempered by spell check but I reached my shame quota yesterday when I took my glasses to get fixed and was judged harshly by how ferociously dirty they were and now I'm just hoping they don't appear on Miss Addict's Twitter feed.

The 2nd of July was last week, which means I'm about a week late with my Inadvertently Ask Elyse section, which was called something completely different last month, due to the terrible spelling created by Elyse. 

Now for those who don't know, what Inadvertently Ask Elyse is, it is where I find the searches from Google that have lead people to this very blog, and then answer them as if they were actually asking the question.

1. Car Hugs

This would be a hug, in a car.
It's not for the amateur hugger.

Now the first question, is this a legimite hug or do you want to go into the canoodling territory?

When I discussed this with the aforementioned Miss Addict, whose internet pseudonym is really annoying to type, she informed me that I had thought about this too much....
Oh that wasn't relevant, she also mentioned that it also depends if clothes are on or off, but you know, I think that is delving very far away from the hugging part.

In terms of canoodling, go with both parties in the backseat, because otherwise that shit gets uncomfortable really quickly.

So, with hugs...
First, what kind of hug?
Because the comforting hug because someone in the car is having an emotional breakdown, very difficult.
Especially, if the person having the breakdown is the driver.
Now, if YOU do feel a need to hug the Crying Driver, make sure the car is in a stationary position, so no one dies. This is an important factor. No death is good, just as a rule.

As a rule, the car is not a good place for the really long hug, if you want to go for that long, kind of awkward for the other people in car kind of hug, get out of the fucking car and hug OUTSIDE the car. Preferably far from the car, so the others in the car talk about how weird a situation that was.
That's just polite.

Ok, so, you are saying your farewells to the other four people in the car.
Since there are four people in the car, and let's just assume that as hugger you are in the back, so, the person in the middle seat is going to be the easiest to hug and it will also be the least awkward.
I'm talking physical position, I'm not sure what kind of emotional attachment there is to that person, who knows, it could be the person you are madly in love with, that everyone knows in an open secret kind of way, who slept with your sister, bestie and boyf last week... Because nothing is helping THAT awkward.  There is also a KT FML in there. 

Now, of the awkward person in the middle, unless you are sitting in their lap, the other side just ain't getting hugged.

To hug the person in front of you, you are hugging the seat as well, be careful of the neck in that, because there can be choking and while some people are into that kind of thing, they might not like it at that point in time.
Other people may freak out and then there will be tears and a shouting match and Oh em gee, how awkward do you want this car trip to be?

Then there is the other person in the front, basically you go through the space in the middle and there is some weird stretching and turning. Not reccommended for people with bad backs and who will whinge about the pain.

There is also the "Drive Thru" Car Hug, which is through the window. This really only works with kind of little people/small children.

Basically, there are many factors to a car hug, you need to find which one works best for you in terms of the situation, the car and the people you'll be hugging.


2. Collegehumor Literal Songs

While I'm going to enjoy the fact that you got here by searching for an ACTUAL website.

Though, all of that being said, I didn't go to College and thus, don't have that kind of humour.
It saddens me too.

It probably saddens me all the more.


3. One Sided Hug- Good or Bad


That's a pretty big question.
Now, there are some variables?

The most important being- Do you feel that front hugging is sinning and needs to be avoided at all times?
Because that would mean "bad", unless you are a rebel.

Some examples of bad times to go for the side hug:






That right there is a please hug me and not on the side for I can drop this Fake Hyde Park Fountain at any stage as I mock this person at my feet.

Celebrate my victory with a proper hug!

Huzzah!










I think in that photo I am almost doing jazz hands...



You want to end a hockey fight with a front hug.
These side hugs are not really a "I'm sorry that the crowd loves this so much" kind of hug.




When teaching someone how to putt in a creepy manner, it should never be done on the side.



When boxing, it's best to go for a front hug, because it allows better access to the ribs to punch them.










When the side hug IS appropriate:



When posing with a musical instrument











When playing Rugby League









When you've just won a Gold
Medal

















When Posing for a photo

Yeah, I DO wish I were Canadian, is it obvious?

And yes, that was a poor example, but I realised I was going to use a photo with another person and without permission and felt bad, so I should be hugging that giant bear...














So side hugs, they are good or bad depending on the situation.

You should always approach with caution and use your best judgment.

4. The Ramblings of Elyse

That's where I ramble and someone can't find the direct link...
Or needs to follow me on twitter...


5. What's the Equivalent of a Hug?

According to Pushing Daisies it is the emotional Hemlich. Someone puts your arms around you and give you a squeeze and all your fear and anxiety come out your mouth in a big wet wad and you can breathe again.



A hug's a hug man.
Though, if we look towards our Christian Side Hugging friends, as I often do, then hug is just euphemism for sex.
So, it really depends what kind of hug you want. The sexual hug, the side hug, the car hug, the hug with the screaming that you haven;t seen someone for ages (it's a personal favourite of mine), the man hug, the hug with the unwillingly participant, the awkward hug, the sandwich hug.

I had a hug with my Scooby Gang once. That was interesting coz it was 4 people, and I think some people were sitting down at a table and one person ran and joined in from the other side because they felt left out.
It was a touching moment.

But basically, question asker, a hug is a hug.
Go with the dictionary meaning: squeeze someone tightly in one's arms to typically express affection.


Seriously, hugs and literal songs...
You'd think it was the only things I ever wrote about...

Now loyal readers, I am taking you in my arms to squeeze to express my affection.

til next time!
Elyse

In case no one has ever noticed, I am deeply, deeply amused by the search terms from Google that helps people end up in my little neck of the internet.

This explains why I have a regular segment about it.

The thing with my search terms, it is either about hugs or about literal songs.
I didn't think my literal song post was that spectacular but it ends up with the most consistent hits.

However, the thing about the hugs?
What IS with that?

At what point should I be worried about this hug thing?
Are some kind of Christians gonna come after me when they notice that my hugs aren't appropriate?
Are some random people going to be all like "You're that girl that rants angrily about Spike and talks about hugs a lot" and then go to hug me.

Dear Fandom,

DON'T RANDOMLY HUG ME!!
If you need to approach me, do so with slow steady movements as not to startle me and cause injury.
If you'd like some tips about dealing with Elyse, please read this helpful information. 

All my love,
Elyse

Dear People I know and work with,

Please stop touching me.

Thanks,
Elyse

When I'm at work, I stalk News websites.
At work, I kind of care about the news, when I have time to myself, not so much.


The work thing is just why there is a delay in posting this and when I found the article. So I found this article ages ago and for those who refuse to click links. Hi Adam!

Does he actually read this?
Either way, Hi Adam!

Oh right, so for those who refuse to click links, here is the summary, some dude got drunk and sent Steve Jobs his review of the iPad.
And really, who hasn't done that?

Just me than?
Well, this is awkward.
I'm working on a scale of how awkward things are. I have a REALLY good one, but I'm pretty sure it is on my list of things I'm not meant to know about and by "not meant to know". That isn't that much of a loaded statement, right?
Not the Scooby Gang, right? Right.

So, moving on...

The Drunken Critic, which is something I wanted to steal until I googled it and it apparently it already exists and then I cried a little bit.
Ok, I'm on quite a bunch of tangents right now.

Ok, the Drunken Critic sent Steve Jobs an email and was all like but how can the iPad be revelotionary when it restricts a whole bunch of content, revolutions are all about freedom!

Which is a nice little quote, I don't think it is something I can really agree with.
I don't think it is necessarily about freedom, except maybe in terms of overthrowing a oppressor but in the two revolutions I mainly know about, which are the French and Russian, while both monarchs were overthrown, it didn't lead to this great free land.

There are actually two Russian revolutions in 1917, one which lead to a democratic-eque government, which last a couple of months before another revolution and the Bolsheviks took over and Russia became the USSR.
 The USSR isn't really known for its freedom.

I just realised that is two posts in a row that I have mentioned something about Russian history.
I did a whole bunch of Russian History at school and it haunts me still.
Oh, Trotsky, the greatest Jew since Christ... I don't think I'll ever forget that. EVER.

So, I think the Drunken Critic wants to believe in liberty, equality and fraternity or for some French Liberté, Egalité, Fraternité. Which rock on son, rock on!
Just because that is the motto of the French Revolution, it doesn't make it real for all revolutions.

Now, considering that we use the revolution else where in life and not regarding the masses deciding to storm the Bastile... VIVA LA FRANCE!
Should I get my beret out?

But revolutions... It has something to do with a car, the revs thing, I don't know what it means.
And in old school records, RPM! Revolutions per minute.
It basically means to turn around, thank you, Wikipedia.

So yeah, Drunk Critic, I want to tell you to shut for being wrong, but considering you are less of a tool than Steve Jobs, you don't get my wrath.

Oh, Steve Jobs... Steve, Steve, Steve...

You're response?

"Yep, freedom from programs that steal your private data, Freedom from programs that trash your battery. Freedom from porn."


There's more, it's published here.


I just want to go with the original reponse.

But do you people ACTUALLY know what freedom is?

Freedom is mostly associated with the political ideal, that everyone is free to make their own decisions.
But it is basically the unrestricted use of something.


Adding or taking away something that makes an aspect of it restricted, is restricting the freedom of use.
There is no arguement to that.
Freedom from stealing private data or freedom from porn, isn't freedom. Don't let them name fool you.
It's not because it takes away that choice that damn it, I might just want to watch some porn on my iPad.

Why do I get the strange feeling that my saying that is going to be quoted often?



It's the attitude of "what about the children? Won't someone think of the children?" that really pisses me off.
My issue with the Steve Jobs comment is basically the same as my issue with the internet censorship blacklist.

It's the same argument, the what about the children. Well, perhaps someone should actually be monitoring what their kids are doing on the computer and do stuff that way instead of making the entire Australian population suffer.

But Steve Jobs freedom from porn is bullshit, who is giving their kids free reign of their iPads to start off with because that is the bigger problem here.


If you want to restrict flash content on your devices, sure, that's cool, just don't claim it has anything to do with freedom because it doesn't. That isn't freedom.

But seriously, someone think of the children! THINK OF THE CHILDREN!


Oh, France, I love you and your motto, but I really don't think liberty, equality or fraternity are actually possible people are just fucked.
However, that's never a reason to stop it from being the ideal.

So, we are 8 days from Bastille Day...
Thus, Liberté, Egalité, Fraternité.

FROMAGE! 

Ok, as a disclaimer, I actually wrote this on the 3rd of June. I just haven't posted it til now, but since I kind of make reference to it in this blog, I felt I should actually post it.
Parts of it are so much less important now, I know. Which is why there is this disclaimer.  




Something happened a couple of weeks that has kind of sent a whole bunch of things into a tailspin.

Which you know, kind of sucks. That one event can just massively impact everything else and it sucks even more because it has overall just made me feel ridiculously pathetic.

Yeah, I'm being deliberately vague. That is on purpose due to the feeling ridiculously pathetic.

But I was thinking about WHY it bothers me so much.
Well, it depends on which angle I look at it. There is the chance that I was fucked over and injustice and all that bullshit. Or you know, lack of respect and trust in me, which I have spent years trying to pretend that it doesn't matter.

The real thing is. I want to be remembered. I want to be able to have some kind of impact to an organisation that I spent years at.
And how do we refer to the passing of time? "Whose weekend was it that year?"
It's not about years or passing of time, but by the names of people.

I leave and it all just fades away.
I fade away.

I realise I do the same thing at work. I'm on the quest for some kind of legacy, some kind of proof that I was there.
That I actually had an impact on something.
Anything.

I think this is something I have a skewed view on. I'm not denying that, but maybe I read through Harry Potter one too many times.
The whole "I remember that name from having to clean the trophies" aspect or the fact at work, I know the names and roles of so many people I've never met because I've either seen them on the show or have seen their names on briefs.
But, I don't have that.

In Stalin's USSR, people would be executed and then wiped out of records. Photos would be doctored, reports destroyed. It would be as those people never existed and that was exactly the point.   What do you mean there was someone who disagreed with me?
What proof do you have?
None. Because I destroyed it.

And there is always need to prove it. If you can't prove it. It didn't happen.
If you CAN'T prove it, than it can't exist.

I can prove I existed. I have paperwork and everything. Pretty sure

Maybe I've over thought this, maybe I just can't see what the actual story is and what happens, and I probably shouldn't care as much as I do.
But I do.

The post that NO ONE has been waiting for!
Well, I am super excited to write it, so awesome!

Last night I saw Wicked. It was the third time I have seen it, I first time was in New York (and NO, not with Idina... I've said that a lot recently. I wish it was Idina), and then last year in Sydney.

You can read all about what I thought about the New York production here.  That is actually a good post about my fleeing the country since it features the link to my quote in the New York Post.

I just reread that post, I was nowhere near as harsh as what I'm about to be. Then again, I think the talent pool of musical actors in New York is much wider. Or I was just super excited to be in New York, which just as likely.

Now, as a precursor to this. I love Wicked. It is one of my favourite musicals.
I'm very much of the "with all it's faults, I love it still" school of thought.
I am not blinded by the awesome and the lights, so if you are going to come in with a "oh noes! Wicked is awesome, how dare you say these horrible things"
Then I laugh a little bit because I can easily say it because I'm not deaf!

So, if you are one of those fanboys who are gonna throw stuff at me for being "mean" or whatever, pretend like I care, since your fanboy status probably has nothing on me.

Ok, I realised something was strange when I started writing.
I didn't have the right soundtrack to my writing happening, but that's now been rectified, hello Idina, I've missed you so.

Last night, the ever present KT and I went on a hot date of pancakes and Wicked.
I am pretty sure I should not word it like that on here.
The pancakes WERE delicious, thanks for asking!

KT was also sick and delirious and almost killed children on the train. It was fun!
The KT part is important part of the story, because it features me getting slapped a lot.

The thing I was most excited about in seeing Wicked this time was the complete and utter lack of Millsy as Fiyero. He is just bad. So bad.
The understudy who was on last night was good, much better.
He managed to get the high notes in As Long As Your Mine. That makes him a keeper in my eyes.
The tight pants at the begining... Well, that's a different issue, he looked much better when he got some looser pants on.

Ok, I just went on a Idina YouTube fest. I'm sorry world.
But that's part of my problem.
I will always compare whoever plays Elaphba and Glinda to Idina Menzel and Kristin Chenowith, and it is is easy to compare to the Original Broadway Cast Recording, because that's what I hear so much, but that's not what I compare it to.
Because I am completely aware of the things that you can do in the recording process, the mixing, the mastering. There is LOTS you can do.
"Ok, Idina, that was great, but just want you to do that last chorus of Defying Gravity again to overdub it. Awesome".
To destroy the magic, that's what happens. I have a further post I want to make about this.

Thus, comparing anything live to a recording is stupid. Yes, I said. You simply can't do it. Unless it is a live recording, but that's a different kettle of fish.

But YouTube? YouTube is a whole nother ballgame. YouTube that is illegally taken, hello copyright, didn't see you there!
Which generally has crappy audio, and you know it's live, and I'm not going to lie, I've watched A LOT of those of Idina and Cheno, so that's the live performance and thus my standard.

And, well, it's Idina and it's Cheno!

As we walked into the theatre KT was all like "I think I like this Glinda more than Cheno" and for the record, yes, Cheno IS how we say it. I was completely devestated.
How could I know someone that would make such outrageous statements about the awesomeness that is Cheno?
Seriously, Cheno should beat you to death with her Tony!


Sorry, where was I?

Now, something you may not know about me is that I enjoy making sarcastic commentary. I know it is a shocking, shocking revelation but you know, sarcastic commentary.

Yes, I will be on that special level of hell for people who talk in the theatre.

Now, KT has threatened to slap me A LOT. Some times I feel if she hasn't threatened to slap me once every time I see here I am not doing my duty as a friend.
She has never carried through with this threat, I found out the reasoning is because I don't like sudden movement and her going to slap me is enough to freak me out.

Yeah, this isn't the Wicked standard though, since I got slapped a fair bit. She didn't care much for my commentary and if anyone is wondering, no, no one did try and kill me.

I stopped writing for some reason and now I don't really remember my issues that I had, but considering that we bitched all throughout intermission and for the train trip home.


Dammit! Why did I stop writing earlier?

I remember there was an issue with some weird harmonies and them sounding off key, well, probably true, but in Defying Gravity, there are some weird harmonies.
It's just strange.

I could try and analyse it with my mad musical skillz, but I can't be bothered.
But there are just some harmonies that aren't the most consonance of a note combination and just say if you are having an off night than it just sounds bad.

My remembering of details is fuzzing.
So in conclusion: I'm a harsh, harsh judge.
I watch too many things on YouTube.
I'm a massive, massive fangirl.

Good times.

Enjoy!

I owe you guys my Inadvertly Ask Elyse post that was due on Friday, yes, the 2nd of the Month is when I do that, I was just preoccupied this time.

I've had a really bad couple of weeks. In many ways I have more or less given up on many things. I actually have a series of things I just can't do when things get bad.

Read, play guitar and write. The reading is long, long gone, the guitar I do because I have to and not often enough.
The sign is actually how long the nails on my left hand are. Just one of those things that only I notice, but you know putting it out there.


That is pretty much excuse for my lack of rambling lately.

But I have something I need to write, that I don't know if I'll post on here or if I'll even write it. I'm not sure it even really matters any more.

The thing that I have learnt, not even recently, just something that was emphasised for me about two weeks ago.

No one is irreplaceable.

No one.

Everyone can be replaced.

It's not the same, no it will never be the same, obviously, but that doesn't mean it can't happen.

That little niche thing you have happening at the moment?
Nope, that can be replaced.


I used to think in my job that they can't get rid of me because I'm the only person that knows how to do the finance stuff.
Well, that's now. Those kind of things can be taught, because they were taught to me and I'll probably have to show someone else to do it eventually.
That's just how it goes, that is how it HAS to go. You are replaceable because things HAVE to change. If things stay the same, things get fucked up.


Life is just about change and dealing with that change.


That's how it goes.
You are dealt your hand, one card is discarded and another card is added to your hand. If you try and go no, I'm not playing that, then you aren't playing the game and you are sitting there with a deck of cards doing nothing and getting no where.


I don't know if I ever thought I was actually irreplaceable.
I have always seemed to be in transient, I don't expect things to stay for very long that way.
In terms of people, I don't expect people to hang around very long and will generally help them with that.
The thing is that once they are gone, someone will take their place and it's not the same, but there is that role being replaced.
And really, no one wants to hear that.


I can think of an actual example of this, but I'm not going to write it down because I think I'll get in trouble for it.
It's not the same, but at least in some ways, it is a replacement.
I'm not saying it's a bad thing, nor is it a good thing. The fact someone had to leave, not cool, but someone new came along, that's cool.


Why is this important?
Because right now, right now I feel like Faith in This Year's Girl.
Yeah, it is a Buffy reference.
Which is funny because I think it is a Buffy reference that is making a reference to the Little Match Girl.
That's what is happening to me.
And Facebook is taunting me with it. I keep seeing the photos, the statuses, the little comments from something I was meant to be at. But instead, I was at home, with the internet as my window to look in.

I got to see who replaced me. I got to see all of that. 



I'm letting it taunt me. Yeah, I'm letting it win.
But I was never that good at the fight.


I want to be remembered.
Not necessarily as a person that changed lives or did something amazing, I just want to be remembered. That I was there. That for at least a small part, that I meant something and that had an impact.
That it was real. That I actually mattered and made a contribution for that small window. That there is some tangible thing.



I wrote something about that a while ago, I don't think I posted it.

I'd like to belong somewhere.
Anywhere.
But I won't.
Even in the group that was the haven for the outsiders, I was exactly that, so much so that in an organisation that claimed that everyone was accepted, there was that "Except Elyse" clause.

Yeah, I'm sorry that there is less with the funny in this.
I have to work some stuff out and I'm not exactly sure what do with all of that, so right now, I'm not fun to be around, so my apologies.

I'll think of some awesome things soon to write about.

I think I have a "Why Glee's Version of Defying Gravity is Terrible?" in the works. I really hope someone is getting worked up in the rebuttal about that just by the title!
Elyse... She is going to diss Glee! That Bitch! Oh, you better believe it. I think I'm gonna take some cheap shots at Kurt too. Who is excited about that?
Oh, and "Wow, this band is terrible live- How CD production is destroying expectations of live music" that I think I ranted about recently in real life, but haven't written anything.

I'll also check my drafts.

As always, I do take requests.
Please don't make me make a video with my singing. I've done enough of that and it never ends well for the internet.

It's been a while, but yes, yes I am alive.

I just have no motivation to write.
I can point you to the people to thank about that.

Not expecting it to change soon.

Sorry for those who enjoyed this blog.
You're welcome to those who are enjoying my demise.

Elyse

I have some love for the FML website...
Oh, you didn't know it was a website?

Well, it is.
It is a website where people write in short stories of which the only response can be "Fuck my life" or in the more work appropriate environment "FML". Just for the record, I clearly am not a work appropriate environment.
Except maybe my work...

That's not the point, so I love the FML website, it makes me laugh heartily sometimes. I prefer the ones where the person who wrote it so totally deserved the outcome.
Yeah, this makes me a horrible person, but you know what, so are so many other people.
This is why they get submitted so some random person on the other side of the world can laugh at their misfortune.

I've written about this before... I just would need to find it and I have capped internet. FML.

Anyway, then suddenly the FML phenomena left the confines of the website and suddenly people put it in their Facebook status... And then the ultimate disgrace. Say it in real life.
I have this thing against people who say internet acronyms in the real world. You know those people who "lol"... you know we have a thing for that in the real life. It's called laughing... OUT LOUD, you motherfucker.
Sorry, I do have anger about this.
Those people need to be slapped and then people should lol about it... by laughing out loud.

So, FML... I heard people use it on the train, Miss Addict (enjoy your shameless plug! And I got the link right first go... Take that! ) also heard it used and tweeted it.

It is not something that I can stand for.
Especially with some of the things that people FML at.

"Today, I had an exam. FML." You want to get an education, these things require exams. You don't want exams, drop out of uni and get a job. "Today, my boss wanted me to actually work. FML",

These people need to harden up, princesses. These are not things that require your life being fucked.
I had 6 exams in three days at the end of last semester. Did I make a Facebook status about it?
Did I say FML about it at all?
No, I accepted that as part of the insanity that is my degree, that I get crazy shit like 6 exams in three days. I sucked it up, did my fucking exams and moved on my life.
Was it hard?
You bet, but whinging is not going to change a thing.

I understand that right now I'm bitching about it, so I am aware of the hyprociy, so it makes me feel better.

But this brings me to my point.
I've decided to fight back and each time that I read on someone's Facebook FML, I will then create a scenario that is so much epically worse, that you will appriecate the challenge that life has thrown at you, over come it and go, no life... FUCK YOU.

So, that is my pledge. That being said, I have some standards, somethings I simply can not be a smartarse about. I have examples, but don't really want to use them. 
As a ranter, if it happens on Twitter, I'll direct you here.

In honour of what I have dubbed the "KT System" since I've done it more than once in her Facebook statuses. Statuii?

Today. Today, I fight back. Take THAT, internet!

Yes, this is my third post for the night.

This is the first post I've actually started writing tonight.

It's my 41st post of the year and the 13th post of May.

These numbers only mean something to me.
I've written more this month than I wrote in 2008 and one would think I would have gone hardcore with my writing when I first started the blog.
Come to think of it, I can't even remember the why I started the blog.


Damn, can't even go to my regular scapegoat of Teen Angst.
Teen angst, that was a while ago...

So far in 2010, I have written more than I did in 2009, give me another post and it will be equal with '09 and '08 combined.
May, 2010 is the one I have written the most posts for.
Good times.

These are interesting numbers.
They fascinate me, but I'm the one that likes the numbers and I look for patterns.
My blog writing pattern is lots at the begining of the month and then stop.
Then again, I have lots of drafts at the moment, most of which won't get published since they are just justifications of stupid behaviour and justifications are bullshit and will annoy me so much more if I publish them.
So, sorry world. In the vault...
Unless you hack my account...

Which, don't.

Thus, numbers, lots of numbers.

I could do a word count, but I think it will make the internet explode.
It would be high, let's just leave it at that.

I lost track of what I was writing about some time ago...
I think I need to find some topics.
Give me some topics!
Seriously, I'll write about whatever!

Aren't you curious to find out what I'd do with a serious world issue?

That being said, I am looking forward to the 2nd of June when I write my favourite segment ever!
That's right... The June edition of the Inadvertly Ask Elyse!
I have some good ones.

I think I have an obsession with hugging...
But it will be exciting!

Seriously need to make that video.
Does anyone want to be in my video about hugging?


And that's how Elyse got involved in making Pornography for the Hardcore Christians...

Yesterday, I was on a quest.

I had to find a book that I planned to give to a friend of mine, I had originally planned to buy it from the internet but discovered I could indeed buy it in Australia. No, that was wrong.

I discovered this when I walked into a bookshop and couldn't see it on the shelf so asked the very stupid question of "Hi, I'm looking for a book".

See, I know it's a stupid question, I was told afterwards that it's only when I don't follow it up with another statement about what book and the person serving me is completely immune to it. Due to the frequency that people do it.

The thing that made this story completely gold is well, the person serving me was hilarious and while I'm sure she thought I was a nutcase, she was amused by it rather than being scared.
I ask stupid questions, but I'm self aware of it.

The gold part of the story, I was looking for a book called "Pirate's Guide to Parenting", while wearing my "To Err is to Human, to Arr is to Pirate".

So, what did I wear while book shopping?
I don't have a photo...
I'm going to have to get a photo, aren't I?

Well, I won't because I'm lazy and in bed and lazy.
So loyal readers, I owe you one.

Yeah, I'm a blog about passive aggressiveness.

This is largely in response to the massively passive aggressive blog I wrote last week, I've been meaning to write it for a while but I've been lazy and had a small amount of writer's blog.

I actually made some vlogs to make up for it and then got really self conscious about them and didn't post them. Even though I spent the hour uploading them to the internet.
So, sorry guys, you are gonna have to wait til I think I'm bullet proof for me to post them.

I think they both feature singing, which is a horrible, horrible thing and yeah, that is the main thing I'm self conscious about so, alas, until I'm feeling bulletproof they are staying in the vault.

 I feel sorry for the person that gets stuck going through my computer.

Anyway! Passive aggressiveness!
My main act of passive aggressiveness has to be the fact I wrote the long detailed blog about unfriending completely aimed at someone who I know reads this. Part of me was curious to see if they'd respond or even bring it up.
If you were curious, no, no they didn't.
Did I bring it up and force a conversation about it? Yes.

One of the many reasons why it sucks to be friends with me.

But alas, I think it's all sorted, if it's not, I'm never going to be told about it, so we all move on.

Yeah, that too was a pointed comment since the person that it is aimed at reads this.

So, passive aggressiveness!

In some ways I think I'm really bad at the passive aggressive games, but that's ok, because I have people to write my passive aggressive emails on my behalf and in return I provide witty commentary and shout outs on my blog of various subtleties.

You'll have to forgive me, I started writing and then stopped at this point and don't remember what I really wanted to talk about.

The passive aggressive things I find most annoying are the Facebook status comments. Yes, we get it, you are pissed at someone, grow up and talk to that person. Don't constantly write annoying vague Facebook status.
If you feel a need to do this so often, get a fucking Twitter account, so I don't have to read your bullshit!

Ok, I think I might be confused about what it is to be passive aggressive... In my mind it's about being aggressive but in a passive way...
Right now I am pissed off at you, but I don't want to confront you so I'll make thinly veiled comments about you.
Where as Wiki seems to inform me it's some kind of personality trait that is a passive resistance to following through with actions in interpersonal and occupational situations.
Thus the "Yeah, I'll do it" and then not doing it.

Interesting...
Which, kind of kills this post for me.
So, I'm gonna stick with the being aggressive but in the not obvious way.

This doubles as sending messages in a non-direct way, which my favourite means to do will forever be there joining lots of Facebook groups with a similar theme... "I miss you so much" "Why are never online?" "I wait all night just to talk to you for a few seconds" "Why are you never by the third window facing the east so I can get the clear view of you as you sleep?"
Yeah, we get it. You are creepy stalker and now everyone on your list is praying that it's not aimed at them.


Basically, stop with the vague, repetative Facebook updates. Unless of course you are hilarious, insightful or a combination of the two.
Work sucks, people sucks. Accept it, move on or get a Twitter account.

Or you know, a blog to bitch about these people...
Clearly, the way to go.


Build  a fan base...
Bitch about fans...
Destroy a fan base.

I typed fan bass that last time.
Is it a fan for the bass? Keeping the music cool or is a fan's bass.
Why do my typos have strange questions...

I need to stop writing random stuff.
Enjoy.

Give me external validation and comment.