The Ramblings of Elyse

When I'm at work, I stalk News websites.
At work, I kind of care about the news, when I have time to myself, not so much.


The work thing is just why there is a delay in posting this and when I found the article. So I found this article ages ago and for those who refuse to click links. Hi Adam!

Does he actually read this?
Either way, Hi Adam!

Oh right, so for those who refuse to click links, here is the summary, some dude got drunk and sent Steve Jobs his review of the iPad.
And really, who hasn't done that?

Just me than?
Well, this is awkward.
I'm working on a scale of how awkward things are. I have a REALLY good one, but I'm pretty sure it is on my list of things I'm not meant to know about and by "not meant to know". That isn't that much of a loaded statement, right?
Not the Scooby Gang, right? Right.

So, moving on...

The Drunken Critic, which is something I wanted to steal until I googled it and it apparently it already exists and then I cried a little bit.
Ok, I'm on quite a bunch of tangents right now.

Ok, the Drunken Critic sent Steve Jobs an email and was all like but how can the iPad be revelotionary when it restricts a whole bunch of content, revolutions are all about freedom!

Which is a nice little quote, I don't think it is something I can really agree with.
I don't think it is necessarily about freedom, except maybe in terms of overthrowing a oppressor but in the two revolutions I mainly know about, which are the French and Russian, while both monarchs were overthrown, it didn't lead to this great free land.

There are actually two Russian revolutions in 1917, one which lead to a democratic-eque government, which last a couple of months before another revolution and the Bolsheviks took over and Russia became the USSR.
 The USSR isn't really known for its freedom.

I just realised that is two posts in a row that I have mentioned something about Russian history.
I did a whole bunch of Russian History at school and it haunts me still.
Oh, Trotsky, the greatest Jew since Christ... I don't think I'll ever forget that. EVER.

So, I think the Drunken Critic wants to believe in liberty, equality and fraternity or for some French Liberté, Egalité, Fraternité. Which rock on son, rock on!
Just because that is the motto of the French Revolution, it doesn't make it real for all revolutions.

Now, considering that we use the revolution else where in life and not regarding the masses deciding to storm the Bastile... VIVA LA FRANCE!
Should I get my beret out?

But revolutions... It has something to do with a car, the revs thing, I don't know what it means.
And in old school records, RPM! Revolutions per minute.
It basically means to turn around, thank you, Wikipedia.

So yeah, Drunk Critic, I want to tell you to shut for being wrong, but considering you are less of a tool than Steve Jobs, you don't get my wrath.

Oh, Steve Jobs... Steve, Steve, Steve...

You're response?

"Yep, freedom from programs that steal your private data, Freedom from programs that trash your battery. Freedom from porn."


There's more, it's published here.


I just want to go with the original reponse.

But do you people ACTUALLY know what freedom is?

Freedom is mostly associated with the political ideal, that everyone is free to make their own decisions.
But it is basically the unrestricted use of something.


Adding or taking away something that makes an aspect of it restricted, is restricting the freedom of use.
There is no arguement to that.
Freedom from stealing private data or freedom from porn, isn't freedom. Don't let them name fool you.
It's not because it takes away that choice that damn it, I might just want to watch some porn on my iPad.

Why do I get the strange feeling that my saying that is going to be quoted often?



It's the attitude of "what about the children? Won't someone think of the children?" that really pisses me off.
My issue with the Steve Jobs comment is basically the same as my issue with the internet censorship blacklist.

It's the same argument, the what about the children. Well, perhaps someone should actually be monitoring what their kids are doing on the computer and do stuff that way instead of making the entire Australian population suffer.

But Steve Jobs freedom from porn is bullshit, who is giving their kids free reign of their iPads to start off with because that is the bigger problem here.


If you want to restrict flash content on your devices, sure, that's cool, just don't claim it has anything to do with freedom because it doesn't. That isn't freedom.

But seriously, someone think of the children! THINK OF THE CHILDREN!


Oh, France, I love you and your motto, but I really don't think liberty, equality or fraternity are actually possible people are just fucked.
However, that's never a reason to stop it from being the ideal.

So, we are 8 days from Bastille Day...
Thus, Liberté, Egalité, Fraternité.

FROMAGE! 

I have some love for the FML website...
Oh, you didn't know it was a website?

Well, it is.
It is a website where people write in short stories of which the only response can be "Fuck my life" or in the more work appropriate environment "FML". Just for the record, I clearly am not a work appropriate environment.
Except maybe my work...

That's not the point, so I love the FML website, it makes me laugh heartily sometimes. I prefer the ones where the person who wrote it so totally deserved the outcome.
Yeah, this makes me a horrible person, but you know what, so are so many other people.
This is why they get submitted so some random person on the other side of the world can laugh at their misfortune.

I've written about this before... I just would need to find it and I have capped internet. FML.

Anyway, then suddenly the FML phenomena left the confines of the website and suddenly people put it in their Facebook status... And then the ultimate disgrace. Say it in real life.
I have this thing against people who say internet acronyms in the real world. You know those people who "lol"... you know we have a thing for that in the real life. It's called laughing... OUT LOUD, you motherfucker.
Sorry, I do have anger about this.
Those people need to be slapped and then people should lol about it... by laughing out loud.

So, FML... I heard people use it on the train, Miss Addict (enjoy your shameless plug! And I got the link right first go... Take that! ) also heard it used and tweeted it.

It is not something that I can stand for.
Especially with some of the things that people FML at.

"Today, I had an exam. FML." You want to get an education, these things require exams. You don't want exams, drop out of uni and get a job. "Today, my boss wanted me to actually work. FML",

These people need to harden up, princesses. These are not things that require your life being fucked.
I had 6 exams in three days at the end of last semester. Did I make a Facebook status about it?
Did I say FML about it at all?
No, I accepted that as part of the insanity that is my degree, that I get crazy shit like 6 exams in three days. I sucked it up, did my fucking exams and moved on my life.
Was it hard?
You bet, but whinging is not going to change a thing.

I understand that right now I'm bitching about it, so I am aware of the hyprociy, so it makes me feel better.

But this brings me to my point.
I've decided to fight back and each time that I read on someone's Facebook FML, I will then create a scenario that is so much epically worse, that you will appriecate the challenge that life has thrown at you, over come it and go, no life... FUCK YOU.

So, that is my pledge. That being said, I have some standards, somethings I simply can not be a smartarse about. I have examples, but don't really want to use them. 
As a ranter, if it happens on Twitter, I'll direct you here.

In honour of what I have dubbed the "KT System" since I've done it more than once in her Facebook statuses. Statuii?

Today. Today, I fight back. Take THAT, internet!

I did get this ages ago, but I am writing about it now, because I can...

A topic at the request of Snix, here it is....


I saw it once.

It was a cold Saturday night. I was at home.

Actually, I don't remember if it was cold, I just remember it was a Saturday night and I was bored watching TV.  It was when it had first been released or just doing the rounds.

As a musical fan, I'm a fan of musicals and thus enjoying watching them. I had heard things about this new phenomenon crushing the tweens with dance and thought "A musical? How refreshingly awesome..."

I checked with my Musical Peeps about the standards of it compared to actually good musicals. One said it was good and that I'd love it, the other said it what shit and to run, RUN AWAY!

I was torn, they are my two most trustworthy sources and who was I to believe?

But I decided to not just take the words of advice from my most trust allies and to go into the abyss and watch.

Oh, I watched.

It was atrocious.
To this day the one thing that I can not get over is the enemies of Zac Efron and Vanessa whatever her last name is, I could look it up and ruin my repuation as an unworthy news source but I'm too lazy for that. Oh wait... Vanessa Hudgens. Thank you for being in many Disney scandals and posing topless on the internet a lot to feature in trashy mags so I can eventually remember your name.

Oh.. Character names... Troy and Gabriella? Is now!

Well, their enemies.
They are brother and sister. BROTHER AND SISTER!
Now, I'm sure many people are thinking that I should get over the fact that people on television do sometimes have siblings. Not that often, but some times they do and I should move on.

Normally I'd agree but the point of the musical and why the Brother and Sister have something against Troy and Gabriella is that they are going for the leads in the school musical.

I'm someone that knows a lot about musicals. Your typical musical, especially your typical musical that is going to be performed by a high school is the quintessial love story. Boy meets girl, boy and girl fall in love, something horrible happens meaning they can't be together in the end and then they get together at the end, everyone lives happily ever after.
That's how it goes.


Your leads in a musical?
They play that boy and girl.

People you don't want playing the leads in the musical... A BROTHER AND SISTER!!
That is wrong and disturbing and just no.

I could sustain my disbelief no longer after that.
Seriously?
What the hell?

ESPECIALLY, ESPICALLY since how much they play the we are the leads in the musical together and when we sing we make beautiful together that we will continue off stage and off screen as not to offend any parents, but man, those front hugs will be hot.
To play that card continually and then throw the fact the people rthat used to be in those roles are siblings?
Yeah, that is not right.

When it comes to my opinion of High School Musical my opinion is so clouded due to that, that I don't remember most of it.

As a result of this most of my opinion then comes to the aftermath and consequences... Which one side I kind of enjoy because if it means that there is a surge of popularity in musicals that means that in Sydney it won't be one musical every couple of months, but more than one?
Like West Side Story and Wicked both showing in July!
That is something I can get behind.
Though, that is far more likely to do with the absolute steam rolling of everything that Wicked is doing.

I'm all for more musicals.
Things I am not behind...

Did you know they made a stage version of HSM?
A STAGE VERSION!
Do you know with that stage version they are doing amateur versions of it?
That is disturbing.

At uni the other day I saw a flyer for an amateur version of it in like Chatswood or somewhere and I'm not going to lie, part of my musical loving heart died a little.

The rant that goes with this is the Jukebox musical. I hate them as well, I'm looking at you Mama Mia! Jersey Boys! The Wedding Singer! Shout! The Dusty Springfield Story.
I find these an afront to musical theatre.

The Wedding Singer in particular, if only because they killed my favourite joke from the movie in there. They tried but they obviously couldn't get the rights to use the Culture Club's Do You Really Want to Hurt me.
But still...

Write your own fricken musicals! Don't just use songs that are already a commerical success and write a dodgy story to make them work because it doesn't and I don't care for it.


But back to High School Musical.
I think they tried to go with some ironic kind of humour with "musicals aren't cool and I'll tell you why- through song!" thing. I think it's humour. I'm really hoping it was because other wise, those writers are fucked and need to be taken out and shot.

Now, the only song I remember was I think the big dance number which I've conveniently stolen from YouTube to destroy your ears, eyes, heart and soul...



That is the only song I can remember and it informs me that I should follow the rules and stick to the status quo. Well, the status is not quo and fuck you High School Musical for contributing your filth to the pop culture vernacular and making people confirm to what are the apparent ideals of high school.


Ok, maybe it hasn't hit the pop culture, but this is going to be like the Grease of the next generation or atleast that's what they were going for.
This is going to be involved in shaping the youngin's pop culture and it makes me sad because Grease?
Grease is hilarious.

I at least knew Grease was taking the piss. I'm pretty sure HSM is not.

Even though I like to forget High School Musical ever plagued the world, I do like the guy that bakes.

Today, I got involved in a conversation with someone and it left me feeling, really, really angry and you wouldn't like me when I'm angry.

Then I got to thinking what I was angry at.
And I was angry about the fact that someone was meant to have their shit together and have some stuff organised.
That stuff hasn't happened.

The bigger issue is, if you can't organise something, ask someone to help you. This is what being a leader is about. Seriously, fucking delegate. Basically, get your shit together.

I was pissed off at this, so very, very pissed off. Have we identified a theme?

Then it hit me.
I had promised to make my Spike rant into a video and I promised this sometime ago and had yet to follow through.
Thus, how could I be pissed off at someone for not organising something when I had been lying to people on this for so long?

So, I did it.
I set up my video camera and started ranting.
The rant goes for about 29 Minutes and 29 seconds. Minimal editing and I would say, very much NSFW since there is a lot of swearing.
There are also a lot of comments about my pants, but I am wearing them, so it's pretty much the swearing that is an issue.

Elyse's Angry Spike Rant from Super Flyse on Vimeo.

I also need to add that I love the screen shot of that, I feel I'm about to fight ninjas or break out into a rap.

Hello, I'm Elyse and I'm a commuter.

I take public transport a lot. Like a lot. Mainly trains, used to be fair bit of buses, but mainly trains.

Unlike on the roads, with those drivers, we commuters don't have any written rules or actual laws. It is chaos out there! SHEER CHAOS!

And that's where I have decided to write about the rules of the commuter.

This isn't just about "I'm on a train? What of it?" This is also about those times when you are standing at a door and think "I wonder if there are rules about this?" and the answer is "YES! MOVE OUT OF THE FUCKING WAY"

So first up, the laws of the commuter.

1. They are called headphones. Invest in them, no one wants to hear your music no matter how "good" you think your music, it's not. This is not a discotheque, just stop it. My murderous train rampage will be started when I'm sitting on a train and then some douche without headphones is all "Check out the awesome Beatles Song", Helter Skelter starts and so does my murderous rampage.

2. The seats. If I am going to have to climb over you, I take no responsibility, if I a) lose balance and end up in your lap, b) stand on your foot, which may lead to point a and finally, I have a messenger bag... It can be heavy, it can hit you in the face.

These three things can be solved quite easily if you either move over or get up and let me in.

3. Personal hygiene. It's close quarters in there, often without windows. Just for the love of god, do something about it.
Or follow these simply rhyming rules: No Reeking, No Streaking.

Which follows nicely, the train is not the place for personal hygiene things. DO NOT SPRAY DEODORANT!
Seriously, close quarters with no windows. Who does that? Fuckers.
Cutting of nails or anything like that. Not the place of the train.
Just for the record, I personally don't have issues with putting make up on the train, since I understand the value of sleeping in, but don't get shitty at people who knock you and all that. You take the risk, gotta deal with the consequences.

4. Doors!
People get off the train first. Let people GET OFF THE TRAIN FIRST!
It creates better flow of traffic and more room.
If the train is packed and you are sitting on the stairs or standing in the foyer type thing, you may just have to get off the train and stand on the platform to wait for people to get off so you are not standing in the way.

People want to get off the train, you are in the way, if you get taken out, bitch, you probably deserved it.

5. Unwanted conversation.
Don't start conversations with me on the train.
I'm not a people friendly person. The train is for quiet conversation with people they know, reading, listening music through headphones and sleeping. Ok, I guess, some people do work on their laptops or watch DVDs, but these are quiet activities.

As a general rule, listening to music on your iPod or personal music device while talking to other people is exceptionally rude and shouldn't be done.

6. School kids... We hate you. Accept this, one day you'll be us and hate the next generation of school kids and the answer is yes, you were once that annoying and obnoxious. Just shut up already.

Which conveniently brings me to my next point. Doorways.

The rule of doorways... People who are getting out, have right of way. Trains, buses, elevators, classrooms. LET THE PEOPLE GO!
Then you enter.
This is the golden rule of doors.

The second golden rule of doors, is don't stand in them.
Oh, you smoke?
That's great, smoke somewhere that is not in the FUCKING DOORWAY!
People need to go in and out, and if I have my guitar case on me, I'm not going to take any prisoners.

My main issue of the day, is get out of the way of door ways.

Some general rules of commuting and walking in crowded areas:
*Stay to the left, unless over taking.
*Don't stop suddenly otherwise some people are gonna fall like dominoes and there will be tears and violence and it won't be pretty.
*If people are running, not jogging, but running coz they are running late or the like, they should dodge and weave, but it's good practice to get the fuck out of the way, because they'll hit you and fuck you up.

I believe this concludes my rant.

Just stay out of the fucking doorways, and we'll be sweet.

I realised I missed my chance for "It's fucking November: The Reprise"

However, it is still November and here we are still with the Christmas stuff everywhere.

I started this rant the other day and they were like "Yeah, well it's the Lord's Birthday".

Problems with this argument.
I accept Christmas stuff once we hit Advent, which is Sunday, which is actually the 29th of November, but Advent none the less.
Take THAT, Advent calenders, you miss two days of some kind of commercialization.

The other point is the way that the shops see Christmas has nothing to do with the whole Jesus' Birthday thing.

What I found hilarious when I was in the US is that to make up for the blatant commerialisation of Christmas, they would throw in the token Menorah to be all like "We don't hate you Jews! Look as we acknowledge Hanukkah as well".
The most amusing thing about this, Hanukkah is not that major a Jewish holiday at all... or not that significant but alas, the token gesture.

Stupid commerialisation and it goes on and on and on...

However, that being said, this year I'm getting a Santa photo. Dammit.

In Decemember, where Christmas belongs!

The Christmas tree at my office went up at the beginning of October, it makes me rant every time. Apparently this makes me a grinch.

I think they mean the Dr Seuss way and not the HIMYM way... because otherwise... Bitches.

Bastards.

Today I decided that I hate the new phones.

It's not technology that I hate, it's just new phones.

I remember the first phone I got it was my sister's old phone that used to be my mum's at one stage, it was a brick and that was awesome! This may surprise no one, but I tend to be very accident prone.

The first phone I bought myself was stolen within two weeks from my house, yeah, it was strange, but I received another hand me down phone and it lasted for a good 4 years and served me well.
By the end the case was stuffed and I was the only that could use it because the buttons were weird, it served me well, when I dropped it which was very, very often it would survive. Sure, some times the case came open and the buttons spilled out onto the street. One of those said times the street was Swanson St in Melbourne, is it Swanson St? It's the street that Flinders St Station is on, well that intersects with Fliders St. Oh, that's going to bug me.
Come on Melbourne readers... Reader? Kaylah!

Anyway, that phone served me well.

Then came the day where I thought I should be all old and responsible or something, or in response to having spent $30 worth of credit in about 3 days mainly from making "Marco" "Polo" phone calls.
Either way, the day came, I went on a plan and got me a bright shiny new phone and even included the request "I'm unco, I need a phone that will survive being dropped".

So, I took my phone home on the train and when I got home I played with it a little bit and then went upstairs, upon trying to go upstairs, my phone fell to the ground. It fell and the screen cracked. Yes, this phone I cracked the screen within 4 hours of owning it. My 4 Years of previous phone ownership did not lead to the death of a screen, but not these new phones!

I carried on, I decided that i will go as long as I could before I replaced it. I was told the crack would slowly get worse until I could no longer read the screen.

I did fine for quite a while, I got the gist of most messages and couldn't really tell the difference between Jacob and Rob sending me messages, but I coped. I did well and then I paid my money and got the screen fixed and all was right with the world.

Then came last week or was it the week before?
whatever.

Sometime in the recent past my phone started playing up and would not stay connected and SIM registration failed. My phone had died. It was tragic.
I took it to the Mobile Phone Hospital (That is the name of the shop, that's why I go there. I now hate it so, I won't be there again) and they couldn't fix it. It was tragic, but I soldiered on.
I went to another phone shop that doesn't have such a cool name and they said they could fix it.

It was a joyous moment.
It would take them 40 minutes. Excellent. 40 minutes I could handle. I did some shopping.
I finally found my helmet for my bike, that's exciting. It was hard to find, who knew? But anyway and then back to retrieve my phone.

BUT NO! ALAS! There was a problem with my phone. I have no idea what, the dude said words, I wasn't listening because I was suffering from hysterical deafness, but it would take another half an hour to fix, could I come back?
Sure, sure I could.

Conveniently it was lunch time, so I went to eat lunch.

Then I went back.
Was it ready?

No, another 20 minutes.

I then went looking for boots. I hate shoe shopping, but I really want boots, so I went to Myer. Did they have boots in size 11?
No.
That's why I hate shoe shopping. Finding Size 11 shoes is a bitch, but that's another rant.
I'm mainly looking for boots because no matter how awesome I think these are, it's a line I don't think my nerd factor can cross.

Anyway! Eventually after my unsuccessful boot quest, I still had time to kill so I sat and watched my newly purchased music video on my iPod (Do You Want to Date My Avatar- The Guild... Watch the Guild! It's awesome!) It makes me laugh.

Then I finally got my phone fixed and what not, so now it's all new and shiny and clean.
He said that it will be fine as long as I don't drop it.

So the lesson here is, when it comes to phones I am screwed.
I always drop my phone! Like all the time.
Old phones could hack it.

New phones... They can't!
It makes me sad.


Not as sturdy, but the camera on my phone is about 5 times better than my first digital camera, so there's that.
That means I can be taunted with defeat every time Mary rings me, or see Lexi death stare me every time she rings and then there is Jacob doing a guitar solo on a piano.
Quality pictures.

That I will be able to see, if I don't drop it.
*sigh*
Is this how I'm going to fail life?

Remember, many spoilers lay ahead, be warned. Though, I'll take some abuse.

Today, I finally finished my epic journey of having read all seven Harry Potter books.

Now going back to the Half Blood Prince and the movie adaption.

So, previously I went through the general reasons why I don't approve of the film adaptions.
I mention my loathing of Harry?
Surely I did, that is one of my main reasons that I loathe the movies and the cut out all of the delightful subplot which is why I read the books!

The sixth book and movie. In my re-read I discovered that sixth is my least favourite book, I always thought it was Chamber of Secrets, but no, definitely the Half Blood Prince.

I can list the reasons why, I find many aspects enjoyable, but it's all set up. ALL SET UP for the final book.
I love that Fred and George not only have their joke shop all set up, but they also use some of their mischief making for the benefit of others. I do love the Weasley Twins, so this makes me happy.

I do hate that Hermione is so whiny in it. I won't lie, out of the three main characters, Hermione is my favourite and when it comes down to the arguement of epic proportions I think she is the real hero and it shines the most in the Seventh book. Harry would have been dead long before if not for his friendship with Hermione and he would have been kicked out of Hogwarts somewhere along the line.
But what happens to Hermione in the HBP?
She pines after Ron, and cries like ALL THE TIME, it is even worse in the movie and I was really hoping they were just amping up the angst for the sake of marketing to the Tweens and the Twilight fans, but no. It is all there.
Oh Hermione, you can do better than Ron! Ok, so it doesn't bother me that much, it's the angst that bothers me.
Then again, it's constant, Hermione was always highly strung and did the bursting out in tears thing alot. It's constant and remains constantly annoying.
In conclusion, shut up, Hermione.

The most horrific thing that occurred in the process of transferring was the final battle.
They take out the fact that Ron, Hermione, Ginny, Neville and Luna were fighting in the corridors, as well as the Order of the Phoenix, which is important for the set up and sets the scene for my favourite thing ever in the seven book, the thing that makes the entire journey brilliant and that is how even with Harry gone off fighting, the students still take up arms in the war and that Ginny, Luna and especially Neville continue to fight and WILL continue to fight even if Harry is dead because that is what they have to do.
Neville's journey in all the seven books is fricken awesome. That he has scars at the end and he knows how and why he got them and they are trophies for a cause. Man, it's awesome.
How are the movies ever going to bring anything like that from the books when they neglected to show that Harry WASN'T alone in the quest. It wasn't just Dumbledore and himself in this great epic fight.

That was always the big difference between Harry and Voldemont, Harry had his loyalities and allies, true allies not minions.

However, not the point. You have all this set up and neglected that it's a battle, that it's a war between two armies, each with their leaders, but beyond that.

Then there is the biggest crime of them all. Dumbledore put Harry in a body bind curse or something making it PHYSICALLY impossible for Harry to be able to interferr in Draco and Snape eventually killing him.
He was there and bore witness to it all, but couldn't do anything until Dumbledore was dead because that is how the spell was broken, and then Snape ran. He ran and took the rest of the Death Eaters with him.
In the movie, he was just there and saw it all and could move and could stop it, but didn't and he calls Snape the coward?
They are cowardly moves, especially when Harry's anger is one of the biggest plot points. He is an angry, angry guy. It's annoying at some points, but it is a constant plot point and it is one of the main reasons I don't like him. Well, that and he misdirects his anger and completely undervalues everyone around him which I just can't stand for.
It goes back to my points about Hermione.

So there we have it, they turned a book that was all set up in to a movie that was all about set up except they missed a large portions of the things that were meant to be set up.

There is a literacy device called Chekhov's Gun (""If you say in the first chapter that there is a rifle hanging on the wall, in the second or third chapter it absolutely must go off. If it's not going to be fired, it shouldn't be hanging there." )
The beauty of books is that everything is there for a reason because everything that is written is in the control of the author. If something on the wall is mentioned, it is mentioned for a specific reason to be recalled at any point or to add a layer of depth to a character. It doesn't exist for any other reason.
In a series of Seven books?
Everything is going to come to a climax of the previous 6 books, the movies can't cover everything and things need to suffer.

And thus, the travesties of the Harry Potter movies exist.
It's a shame too.

I can't seperate the two in my mind either. Often I can do that, but nope, not in this case.

Why, why?

Oh well...

Tomorrow is a new day, and a new book...
Or a new rant...

Maybe combine the two.

SPOILER ALERT! The Toaster Falls in Love!
So if you haven't read the Harry Potter books (or seen the movie) approach with caution because the spoilers are EVERYWHERE!

Be warned.



So, I'll admit it, I'm a bit of a Harry Potter Tragic.

I have read the entire series through when one of the new books was released (well for 4,5,6, and 7) and the procceded to read Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows in one day, the day it was released.
Needless to say, I am very familiar with Mr Potter and the rest of that crew.

Knowing all of this, I have also seen the films. I've seen all of them exactly once and generally at the movies. Which in itself is a fairly big deal since I think the last 10 movies I've seen at the Movies 6 of them have been the Harry Potter movies.

Why is that I have read the books countless times but yet, only seen the movies once?

I realised it one my last read through, I hate Harry Potter. The Character. I really, really hate him.
I pinpointed the moment where I really started to loathe him, in the begining of HP and the Order of the Phoenix when he has this massive go at Ron and Hermione about keeping him out of the loop in regards to stuff and the proccedds to yell at them how he is this big massive hero who has done all this great stuff.
Well, just shut up Harry!
You'd be fucking nowhere without those two! In fact you would have been dead in the first book, as well as kicked out of hogwarts for failing so just shut the fuck up boy!

This is very important to why I dislike the movies.
The books have created this rich multidimensional world full of such a range of characters, from black hats to white hats to those who play in both worlds. Generally the line between good and evil is pretty clear, except for Snape who is the most interesting character, which isn't generally my forte.
But all those characters are there! They have stuff to do! Other plotlines and little things happening, it's not all about Harry and whatever happens to be the title, which another issue when it comes to the 6th book/movie.
The Weasleys are such a massive part of the books and pretty much are Harry's Family and they are just byproducts of the movies.

So that is my major problem with the books, I hate Harry and the movies take all away that delightful subplot and just leave me with harry.
Why would they do that?

Then of course, we have my other problem, why are they wearing pants?
Seriously, all the wizards are wearing pants! What the hell?
It's meant to be robes! Robes aren't meant to be at all pant like. They are meant to be well, Robes! That is just some poor design.
And don't get me started on the whole people not wearing robes outside of Hogwarts, in the books they always make a big deal about the lack of ability of wizards to dress like Muggles.. Largely probably due to the pants!
One of the first comments I made to myself upon seeing the opening scenes was "My God, Snape is wearing Pants" and then "My God, they are all wearing Pants!".
Pfft...

Ok, now on to the casting, which isn't entirely their fault since they are limited by people and with talent. It would be hard to do.
In particular, Dumbledore is totally not quirky enough. Seriously, Dumbledore in the books is an absolute nutjob, a genius but a nutjob. The Movie Dumbledore doesn't come across with the nuttyness. It's disappointing.
Alan Rickman is pitch perfect, love him! Though, it is Slughorn and Umbridge.
Mainly because I swear Slughorn is described as being like a Walrus, so I've always pictured him kind of like the Walrus in Alice in Wonderland, the Disney Movie, as in the Walrus and the Carpenter who eats all the oysters.
And Umbridge is described as being Toad like, so I always pictured a human Toad like thing from Mario, you know the evil ones... Toadstalls? What the hell are they called.

Elyse says as she rapidly loses her nerd cred.

But yeah, I guess that is bound to happen, it is just they were so vividly described.

I guess I'm going to have to save my specific rant about Harry and the Half blood prince for another day, as it is late and I am old and it's a school night... or work night, whatever.

'til next time,
Elyse

Advent starts on the 30th of November this year.

Upon that date, I will stop whinging.

'til then I will suffer the stabbing pains into my heart every time I see those overly decorated locations every morning in Parramatta.

And now, for my favourite thing to write about:
The views of my dictionary.

This week we have whinging vs whining.
Whining is what my dictionary states to be the correct.

So, do I whine about how delicious my bag smells? Would I like some whine with my cheese?

Or do I whinge about how Chris is stealing my friends and then making fun of me about said friends?
Hmmm... Shout out. Hi Chris!
According to my dictionary, I should be whining, not whinging.
Let's see what Urban Dictionary says. It tends to agree with me.

This was my favourite response for whinge:
A British/Australian/New Zealand (possibly South African and other commonwealth) English word which describes incessant complaining. A behaviour commonly associated with poms/pommes/pohms/pommies (people from England).

And whine:
1. Usless complaining to others that dont care.
2. Making oneself feel important through the use of usless complaining
3. Using complaining as propaganda to make someone or something look bad
4. plain oll' bein a fag

So, they do mean the same thing, which I knew.
But the question remains: Is whinge a real word?

Urban Dictionary is the worst source ever, but I think it is hilarious and well, it agrees with me so what's not to love?

And my Google search agrees with me.

I think the internet is destroying the English language.
Ok, I think I am destroying the English Language, but the internet is helping me do it!

Stay tuned for my next post:
My thoughts on a Clockwork Orange. The book, not the movie.
I'm not sure I could watch the movie, amazingly I can read all about graphic violence, I don't think I could watch it.
So a Clockwork Orange.
Another book about society and trying to change it.
Clearly, it's my genre of choice.

As a prelude to my lovely rant I want to make a few comments.
Currently, I am at work, which means my Internet Explorer doesn't come with the dictionary to check my spelling as I go. Thus, this time there shall be no commentary on my lack of understanding of the English language (Ha! Take THAT, Tokyo!).
For the record, I have been working and shall be working otherwise but sometimes when I feel a rant coming on it is like an explosion of random words that need to be said otherwise I shall spontaneously combust!

So here it is.
IT IS FUCKING NOVEMBER!
Yes, my office is covered in calenders, I know the date. As I sit and use my spinny chair and do a revolution I can see 4 calenders on various walls. Ok, two are on the white board. That is without using the calender on my computer, my phone or the calenders I know that everyone in my office has on their walls of their cubbys. I can't see them from the angle I looked.
So that is the date. It IS FUCKING NOVEMBER.

Now those who are calender challenged know.
Christmas, or Advent starts on the 1st of December. The first of December as we all should know is NOT November! Ok, granted sometimes the first Sunday of Advent does fall around the 30th of November, but still it is the 13th!

Last week, I had to put up the Christmas decorations in my office. Forced to! I tried to decline and said I was morally against it, which wasn't me being lazy, it was me being actually morally against it. I was told I was a Grinch (Dr Seuss Grinch, not a How I Met Your Mother Grinch) and then basically told to suck it up. We aren't here for December so everything in December is moved to November, so my Pseudo Birthday is on Friday. We are having cake. It will say "Happy Pseudo Birthday Elyse", if anyone is curious I had to spell check pseudo to make sure it was spelt correctly on the cake because that would have never ended if I hadn't. It is what happens when you work with editors.
I put up the decorations. I even went out and bought a Christmas tree, it was $8 for a 4ft Christmas Tree! How awesome is that! That's $2 a foot. People made fun of me due to how excited I was about said price. Not people I work with, people I told the story to.
My friends are evil.
That's quite possibly why they are my friends, but that's a tangent.

I could deal with a very Weekender Christmas. Only just but I'd carry on.

Then today! TODAY!
I was on my way to getting the bus from the train and since I was hungry I went to go hunt down some breakfast, using my lovely trivia winnings to pay for it. Woo trivia winnings. And there I saw it.
Christmas decorations in Westfields. I shook my head in disgust and went "Dude, what the hell?" and then it got even worse Gloria Jeans, already bad because it is coffee and coffee is the devil, had a sign covered in tinsel advertising some Christmas promotion.

IT IS NOVEMBER! NOVEMBER! MID-NOVEMBER at that! What the hell?
The commercialisation of Christmas is something that really annoys me. It brings out my hardcore Catholicism.
NOVEMBER!

Apparently in the States anything remotely Christmas related is held off until after Thanksgiving, so the end of November but the shops have the end of Halloween and Thanksgiving to get their commercialisation . So they can corrupt several traditions!

Communism isn't bad in theory. It really isn't, it's just that Communism can't work in practise but that loyal readers (Hi Rob!) is a rant for another day.

I must be off to the mail room, otherwise people shall be annoyed!
'til next time!
*tips hat*
*rides off into sunset*