The Ramblings of Elyse

It's the 2nd of the Month, which means only one thing.

And that one thing only means something to me, but that one thing is all those Google Questions answered!
This is the third part of a series which I hope is ongoing because it my favourite thing to write!

This Month's Google Searches, that lead many people here. I am here to answer the questions you never asked!


1. Elyse and the aftermath 

I am not entirely sure why so many of these searches include my name, but it happens a lot. Maybe I should stop referring to myself in the third person so much....

Nah... That's not going to happen.

Though, I am assuming you are asking about my role in the aftermath.
So, I did a quick dictionary search of "aftermath", just so we are all clear on the matter.
Here are the meanings:

aftermath |ˈaftərˌmaθ|
noun
1 the consequences or aftereffects of an event, esp. when unpleasant : food prices soared in the aftermath of the drought.
2 Farming new grass growing after mowing or harvest.

Well, I don't actually have a role in any kind of farming.
Thus, my story of Elyse and the aftermath.

"As the workers slaved away in the field at the hands of a master that was very unforiving, Elyse, the name they spat out whenever it was mentioned. Whenever something even sounded like that very name there was a united shudder. They were trapped in this field, untited in the hatred of this Elyse character.

They planned, the schemed and under the moon of the harvest they decided that finally they would have action.
Once their duty was done and their debts apparently paid off as the corn was collected and bundled together  to sell at the market. They would rise up and take control of the land.
They would be free.

At least, the day was done and the fields were clear.
They took their posestions and the plan began.

The small ringleaders had expected the masses to follow, but they did not.
They were defeated and their cries of the defeat cried out into the night as their blood made way for the new growth of land.

Their blood would create the aftermath of the next harvest".

That is why I'm not a writer.
So, another story of Elyse and the first definition of aftermath.


Consequence?
Well, we all have consequence.

What kind of thing are you looking for?

My consequence is that I get to see who people really are.
It's interesting.
It's not in good times that you find out who people are, it's when they are challenged.

That's the fun of the aftermath.
That's where things are revealed.

I really wish that wasn't the case.

But alas.
Stick with the first story...
It's kind of funny.

2. Hugging Problem

Admitting you have a problem is the first step.
Or is the second step?

Is it even a step?

Whatever, so you have a hugging problem.

Do you feel unconformtable hugging people or being hugged?
Or are you just really bad at it and need some guidance into how to hug.
If that is the case, I am in the process of working on an instructional video about hugging.
I promise it won't include any rap and that hurts me most of all.

The first thing when it comes to hugging is an understanding between the person more active in the hugging process (the hugger) and then the person who is kind of relecant (the huggee).
Hey, if you are having a problem with the hugging, there is gonna be a hugger and a huggee...

If it's a mutual problem, then you are probably hugging wrong and you need to sit down with your behugged and talk some stuff out.
Especially if you feel a need to be doing the Christian Side Hug because otherwise the sexual tension is making everyone feel uncomfortable.
If you hugging someone has ever made a non-hugging particapiant leave the room.
You need to have a "Hug Chat" which is the discussing of when your hugs became less hugging more canoodling.


Now the understanding needs to take into account the fact of what kind of hug is it going to be?
Is gonna be a side hug?
Is it gonna be a they are sitting down, I'm standing up and thus there needs to work out how they hugging is gonna work like that?
Awkward car hug?

There are so many questions to be asked.
And I will provide solutions in the Ramblings of Elyse presents: Hugging Problems- What's up with that?

Trust me googler, I got your back. I'll work on this day and night until I have an answer!

3. Literal Songs

I get this one a lot.
Which is kind of awesome and hilarious.

What is a literal song?

It is a song that accompanies the original song's filmclip but the words have been changed to describe what is happening in the film clip.

Though, for a dictionary definition:
Literal: taking words in their usual or most basic sense without metaphor or allegory
Song: a short poem or other set of words set to music or meant to be sung.

So, taking words in their most basic sense without metaphor set to music.

Ummm... that's not helpful.
Just read the original post.

4. Stalking

Dictionary:  harass or persecute (someone) with unwanted and obsessive attention

I assume you already knew that, perhaps you were looking for some tips on stalking.
I suppose I could supply some...
Not really my area of expertise, but I do have a friend that her alternative use is her knowledge of stalking.
I could ask, since she is totally  stalking me.
I think she is outside my window right now.


But, from what I've learnt from TV.
Stalking will totally get you the girl of your dreams...
It may just be if you are a vampire.
So, if you are a vampire. Stalk her until she gives in. Just remember: Be Safe.



5. Ramblings of Elyse

That would be here.
I hope you found what you were looking for.

Which seems like a ramble from Elyse and I am only too happy to provide such a service.


6. Whatever Happened to Elyse? 

Good question. 
Anyone know the answer? 




Until next month, Search hard.